Thursday, December 31, 2020

1320 days alienation since parent interstate kidnapping

 

PSALM 56: 8-11

"You have kept count of my tossing; put my tears in your bottle.

Are they not in your book?

This I know, that God is for me. In God, whose word I praise, in the Lord,

whose word I praise, in god I trust;

I shall not be afraid."


P


 

 

Friday, December 25, 2020

1,314 days May 21, 2017 - December 25, 2020 since Parent Abduction and Parent Interstate Kidnapping

 December 25, 2020 



2017 - this was taken a couple of weeks prior to
Abduction and Kidnapping by their dad. 



December 25, 2020 taken and sent from her dad today.  


    It's December 25th another day.   Another day of Trauma abuse for our girls and I.  

    I got a morning message from our oldest daughter for merry christmas - I had asked her several times for photos but she never sends them. In fact I have sent her at least one message and sometimes several messages per day since the day she and her sister were Parent abducted and kidnapped on May 21, 2017.  I have not received any messages back from her.  I received texts messages from her after they left - i thought her dad was angry and cooling off - but abruptly her messages stopped.  I now know why.   I asked her to please take a photo of herself with her Christmas gift that momma sent to her - I only got the message from her today.  Im curious most of the time even if it is from her.  I can tell by the spelling used in the message who the messages belongs to.  She has a different way of spelling - that is precious to her momma. 

    About 11 am I got three photos of our oldest daughter opening her gift from me.  Three photos of our beautiful girl that no longer look like our beautiful girl.  This is horrific for a parent to do this to a child.  

   To say Psychological trauma abuse it really a mild term.  I asked if she is not allowed to use her phone and then I was blocked from her phone to send her a thank you message for the gifts that she and her sister sent to me with a photo of them. 

    There were no more messages from her to me - and no messages or photos at all from our handicapped daughter.  None.  

    Today was my regular schedule day for my Thirty minute supervised phone call.  I called at my normal time to call her and at 32 minutes the phone was hung up.  I tried to engage in conversation with her but she says bye, poppy, or please the entire call.  Today she said please and was clearly distracted the entire phone call - as she is every time I call.  There is no engagement from her and I am reading her books and nursery rhymes that I used to teach her vocabulary, teaching her interactive and engaging activities and skills of word building and phonetic sounds.  She has not been encouraged or suggested to engage.  

    Most often I hear tones going off during our phone call or distractions of whatever she has or someone else has in the background. This has been disruptive and in addition to causing a disruption in our relationship.  She can no longer say mommy - nor is she encouraged to. Mommy was her base word- her first word and her attachment word.  

    This is caused irreparable harm and trauma to each of us.  Our oldest daughter is 22 and can't be allowed or send text messages or even emails to me.  This is abusive and coercive control.  And for those who emancipated of age decades ago can't be adult enough to encourage a child to have a relationship that they were part in severing is beyond horrible to me.  

    Follow the money trail ....... 

        Follow the money trail .........

with love and Merry holidays - 

    This is become the new "cash cow" .  Our daughters parent kidnapped - and coerced to live a life style they did not grow up with our oldest daughter for ( 17 years ) and our youngest daughter ( almost 14 years) . Financial abuse, Guardianship abuse, medical kidnapping, psychological trauma abuse.  Using children as a weapon to punish a mother.  


Severe Parental Alienation : A mental health emergency 

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/resolution-not-conflict/201910/severe-parental-alienation-mental-health-emergency

How Mother - child separation causes Neurobiological vulnerability into adulthood 

https://www.psychologicalscience.org/publications/observer/obsonline/how-mother-child-separation-causes-neurobiological-vulnerability-into-adulthood.html?fbclid=IwAR0aALiVpFOciPxubtDidk2lZxQWO5CM3pelsUShf2AtnV8vDBcaSXHq11g#.Xgo1Q7ET9Fq.facebook

    

    

    


Tuesday, December 22, 2020

1312 Days since Abduction and Interstate Kidnapping

December 22, 2020  

12/22/2020 Abigailes photo with mommy gift- a quilt with hugs to remember mommy 💕

             
Abigaile the week prior to May 21, 2017 abduction and kidnapping ðŸ’•

    I have so much more I want to write.  I have so much to say.  I will be doing an update when I can get some filings done and caught up.  

    There will be no christmas for me this week.  No family. No friends.  I have some new friends who are also alienated and there are Zoom sessions.  

    I was able to hear our daughter for almost an hour tonight on the phone- the transcript is beyond sad. Hearing bye please the entire call. Its very difficult to hear.  The runny icing off the cake was the photo.  I love my beautiful girls but our oldest daughter won't message or call. She is 22 - you would think she could have a choice to call.  

    The photo is disheartening.  There is no best interest when you have coercive control to force children to live polar opposite of how their upbringing has been.  I can't imagine what our children have experienced, I can not imagine what they have been forced to do.  Including to not be able to call me, their mom when they want. There is no voice mail set up- they can't communicate freely with me and all they have heard is how I have been abusive and neglectful to them? 

  No, this is actually Psychological trauma abuse.  They were not abused and they were not neglected.  
They were neglected when I was denied using our daughters van that was purchased by her medical trust. Refused and told that I needed to ask my husband permission to use the van that was to be for her use? 
    No, she was neglected when I begged to take her back to California to do her therapy- the therapy that had her independently walking, not prescribed drugs, and she was happy and healthy. 

    And to the "misled caregiver" who spoke fraud in the court hearing in November.  You have been misled and lied to and you have perjured your testimony.  I was the primary caregiver for our daughter since they were born.  I stayed at home with them both, homeschooled both of them. And taught them by far more than the deceptive institution brainwashing for federal funding they are getting now.  I was the health care manager and primary caregiver. Our Abigaile would be dead if it were not for me.  I had to do CPR on her a couple of times and my previous career was nursing.  I have worked in the hospital environment with 8.5 years experience in addition to 2 years in a specialist pod.  In addition it was my care plan that the government used for her care plan because it was working.  
    You see our daughters were abducted and kidnapped May 21, 2017 just as I said in court.  After a confrontation with Allen about a situation.  He left abruptly and then hid our daughters for a year and half after May 21,2017. I would learn January 2019 through a serving for a dissolution of marriage ( which was never told to me) that our children were abducted and taken to a family violence shelter with false accusations that were never substantiated and never investigated by the state of Texas where we were residents.  
    I had local, regional and state authorities ( documented ) even with case numbers documented - that I was searching for my children.  I was abandoned and deserted in addition to finances cut off and no transportation in an area that I had no resources and no contacts.  I couldn't use legal aide- because he did that and it was a conflict of interest.  I learned from divorce papers that I was served a year and half after he interstate kidnapped our daughters ( without my knowledge or without my consent ) on the divorce papers it states that he lived with our daughters with his mother in her elder gaited community.  So his mother aided in kidnapping and holding our daughters in her home this is on court document. I have no way Ms caregiver of when you came on the scene but you automatically testified that our daughter was emancipated ( no she isn't of age yet ) and then the opposing counsel ( who has also fraud the court with heresy ) that our daughter was emaciated.  
    So there is your answer. Our daughter was health and happy, no consecutive seizures or generalized seizures.  In addition no drugs were ordered by her Dr the same one that has since found it profitable for Munchausen ByProxy https://www.uofmhealth.org/health-library/hw180537 .  This is because of family history.  So our daughter was emaciated because of the lack of care, neglect and Psychological trauma abuse from being abducted and kidnapped and has been punished and ignored for saying mommy.  I shudder at the thoughts of the abuse this child has endured.  So you determine what day since May 21, 2017 and when you seemed to take charge and you can be assured it was not my abuse or neglect.  
    In addition to this I trained on all of my daughters therapies, her treatments, and I administered medical and health care for her. She was rehabilitated and doing well. I cant imagine why a parent would ever jeopardize their childs health and well being but I can assure you I didn't.  She was destroyed and her health abused and neglected as well as exploitation by every person on her team.  
    In addition to this I homeschool both of our daughters.  Our daughter had 20-25 words that were clear and spoken before she was taken.  She also spoke in two - three word sentences.  She had full cognitive understanding of those words and sentences.  She had cognitive understanding as well as receptive language.  In other words, I taught our daughter her words, her grammar and her language skills.  To say that she is saying bye ( stating that is her wanting to get off the phone with me and throwing stuff down) again, you have been misled or lied to.  What this is - is Abigaile requesting to go bye to see me ( her mom) she in fact is begging to see me.  I hear her hitting and throwing things. When a non verbal child does this it means they feel not heard and they are frustrated. It further causes the drop seizures in addition to a lack of trust with whomever this is taking place with.  
    Please be careful misleading my child.  I know my child better than you, better than her dad or her sister.  To mislead a child in this scenario is custody interference.  This also misled the court record.  I know my child.  
    What is being done and has been done is child psychological trauma abuse.  Instead of placing blame on  me and the continued abuse of our daughters it would be respectful to admit what has been done by those who planned this event since at least 2012.  
    I am not done with this.  I will update in a few days the court hearings and give my perceptions of what happened. This is about her dads wants - it has nothing to do with me abusing my children.  I have been abused because I have stayed at home with our daughters and that was our choice.  The family of origin for the dads family has always voice their disagreement with this. In addition to the medical trauma they have cause due to addictive behaviors.  
    I won't allow lies to be projected on to me any longer my children know the truth of what has happened and we all know who the perpetrators are.  What has been done since May 21,2017 is the mental and emotional, Psychological trauma abuse to our children.  

    I have done one interview and I have more planned.  Stop the abuse to my children.  I take responsibility for what I do - but to lie and kidnapp our children for a false narrative this is abuse.  

#JusticeforAbigaileandNatascha 














                                                                    









Saturday, November 14, 2020

1273 days abducted and kidnapped , estranged

  My handicapped daughter is currently medically kidnapped. After being traumatized , abducted and kidnapped to another state. Thank you for bringing awareness and validating what is happening. When will people bring validation to the children and families this is happening to. My inalienable rights God given , have been taken from me to harm and traumatized my child in the name of profit. 

I will do interviews and continue my advocacy for our daughter. Please message me on the email provided on the blog to schedule interviews. 

Part 1 

https://youtu.be/CZID7AHdNrQ

Part 2 

https://youtu.be/ipkH2CWabRM

Please pray for our daughter. 

Please help me to set our daughter free from this. Please help me to Bring Abigaile home. 

With love 

Xoxo


Monday, November 9, 2020

1268 days ago the world ended to me

   I want to first and foremost say thank you to my family, my friend, my neighbors, and even complete strangers for helping me through what would seem like is eternal hell. I am thankful to each and everyone of you who has extended kindness, love, and generosity even when you didn’t have it to give yourself.

   This is what faith looks like in the flesh.   It has by no means been easy. I have cried countless nights, countless days. I have felt frustrated, helpless, beyond controlled and manipulated. At the end of each of these feelings God has always had someone there who has encouraged me  no matter how bad it looked and no matter how bad the news coming to me seemed impossible. 

   There really is no hell and I’ve experienced a lot of  hell in my life because of my own bad choices, and because of others bad choices that I’ve had in my life. But there is no hell like the hell of watching your children being put through hell when it has been completely unnecessary. To be forced and coerced out of my daughters lives has been the worst form of punishment I’ve ever experienced in my life. Sadly I can only speculate why, who, and for what horrible reason but it doesn’t get back the time that has been stolen from their childhood - it doesn’t gain them or me extra time stolen from me. My days will be shorter in number than theirs.

  I’m writing this because tomorrow Tuesday, November 10 is the trial that I have been waiting for for 3 1/2 years. I’m asking for your prayers and for the Lord’s prayer that His will be done on earth as it is in Heaven.   I can only pray for  spiritual justice from God. I pray for truth and only truth. 

  I’m beyond thankful for each and every person who has been praying for me and my family. It has been a long 3 1/2 years of trying to make sense of something that makes no sense. And it has been a long 3 1/2 years of being forced away from my  daughters. This is truly been the most horrific trauma I have ever experienced in my life. And I have experienced near death more than once. I’m grateful and thankful that I serve a God who believes in life who believes in truth and who believes in justice. 

  I pray for each and every person that is involved in the hearing tomorrow.  I pray that only truth will come out and only truth will be on record. I pray that all the darkness and I pray all the deceit will be illuminated by the light. 

  I pray that God bless each and everyone of us with truth and justice.

Monday, November 2, 2020

1261 days abandoned, estranged and stolen from our daughters childhood - childhood trauma abuse

   





  The childhood trauma and pain that our children have endured is beyond unbelievable to me.  

  I can see so many warnings signs from the family of origin of where this addictive and trauma abuse comes from.  All childhood and all trauma abuse.  

  Including the adults perpetrating this trauma onto our children and to me.  I saw warning signs early on but didn't know what it was called.  I started doing research and looking up the behaviors.  I sent case studies and articles to my husband and our daughter but it was sadly too late.  


   Once I noticed the warning signs and I noticed gas lighting and splitting, befriending, so many things I had no idea what to do.  When I sent these articles I thought my husband would talk or communicate with me.  I knew already by our conversations early on in our relationship and other conversations about addictive behaviors of family of origins.  

   I would also bring up when these behaviors were being done by family of origin to me and our daughters - I was told not to worry.  Things escalated to other addictive behaviors coming out.  This is when I saw oppositional and defiant behaviors.  

  This is when the abduction and interstate kidnapping happened.   Sadly, looking back I can clearly see it was all planned.  

  In addition to this I have over 70 local, state, and federal agencies in Texas and Florida who tried gas-lighting me and assisting the kidnapper in keeping our daughters from me.  They have held our daughters hostage in Florida with the cult club in addition to the court aiding in labeling our handicapped daughter  as a ward of the state. The opposing counsel, judge and even the pro bono attorney has aided in this form of trauma abuse and mental anguish.  # Alachua County Circuit Eighth District - Florida.  Has knowingly protected a parent kidnapper while my children have been traumatized in addition to our handicapped daughter who has been financially exploited and medically kidnapped.  

  I work with other parents who have also been targeted as alienated parents and children have been kept from them and children.  I so happened to come across video tonight - and I sent it to my daughter and former spouse.  I wanted to share this here. 

  Lets hope that those of you who don't understand and just tell those of us who have experienced this- " get over it and move on ".   And some of us still experiencing this - if you have children and someone kidnapped them and kidnapped their mind where they were no longer in your life and if you don't have a issue with that - then you never had a healthy attachment with your child.  

  This is grieving children and watching them tortured and traumatized because of generational dysfunctional family systems that never dealt with the junk in their attic of their mind - trauma. And the courts and attorneys, as well as local, state and federal agencies exploit it.  

  Please watch this video and have compassion on us and our children.  This is a horrific form of trauma abuse.  Horrific !! I would not wish this for anyone not even my worst enemies.  To watch my children Psychologically traumatized and to be kept from them and to have a system that perpetrates this, exploits it and even rewards this type of behavior is about as system reprobate minded as it gets.  


This is what a Targeted Parent of a Sociopath looks like :  

https://youtu.be/zVa7bmdRBkw


#Justice for Abigaile and Natascha 

Tuesday, October 27, 2020

1,255 days May 21, 2017 - October 27, 2020 Stolen from my children and me

 Kidnapping is a serious offense in Gods law. 

How many commandments do you break? I hold you in contempt of Gods law. In addition you teach my children to hate and that it’s okay to break Gods commandments. God will deal with those who kidnap. 


#Godly Justice for Abigaile and Natascha


1. . Exodus 21:16 “Kidnappers must be put to death, whether they are caught in possession of their victims or have already sold them as slaves.

2. Stealing an innocent and righteous children , being raised in purity , to be sold and defiled - 

Deuteronomy 24:7 If someone is caught kidnapping a fellow Israelite and treating or selling them as a slave, the kidnapper must die. You must purge the evil from among you.

3. Leviticus 19:11 “You shall not steal; you shall not deal falsely; you shall not lie to one another.

4.Deuteronomy 5:19 “‘And you shall not steal.

5. Romans 13:1-7 Let every soul be subject unto the higher powers. For there is no power but of God: the powers that be are ordained of God. Whosoever therefore resisteth the power, resisteth the ordinance of God: and they that resist shall receive to themselves damnation. For rulers are not a terror to good works, but to the evil. Wilt thou then not be afraid of the power? do that which is good, and thou shalt have praise of the same: For he is the minister of God to thee for good. But if thou do that which is evil, be afraid; for he beareth not the sword in vain: for he is the minister of God, a revenger to execute wrath upon him that doeth evil. Wherefore ye must needs be subject, not only for wrath, but also for conscience sake. For for this cause pay ye tribute also: for they are God’s ministers, attending continually upon this very thing. Render therefore to all their dues: tribute to whom tribute is due; custom to whom custom; fear to whom fear; honour to whom honor.

6. You shall have no other gods beside Me. You shall not make for yourself any carved idol, or any likeness of any thing... you shall not bow down to them, nor serve them.

7. You shall not take the name of the Lord your God in vain. ( you do this when you defile the ways of God- not just cursing).

8. You provoke your children to sin against God- their Creator- when you project or teach them

to hate in their heart against their biological mother or father.

9.  You shall not murder. ( when you hate and project hate towards another you MURDER in your mind) teaching children also to murder in their mind.

10. You shall not steal. The most horrific form of terror. To remove a child from their known surroundings and take them from their safe place. To force or coerce another human being into

Captivity and slavery against their will is evil and terroristic. ** There ARE times that parents need to make choices for safety for them and their children but when you do this to control the child or another’s thinking this goes against God. God allows every human free choice. Making choices to control and manipulate are evil not God. 

11.  You shall not bear false witness against your fellow. This is lying and deceit - not of God. Teaching your children or projecting into your children. This is Psychological Trauma to children. And because you pay your handlers called attorneys and pay the court to keep lying - you will be found out . Your children aren’t foolish - they know and wait the opportunity to jump into

Bad relationships and bad parties just to leave the lies and deceit. A person who lies even lies to themselves covering deceit until they can’t rememberer their own lies.  Just because you have others in your cult that agree with your lies does not make it truth. It’s a lie. 


The commands of God are a Treaty of Covenant with God. 

Stop looking for a sign in the sky, a light projected city, people flying up to the heavens- this is religion. 


God judges daily by what you do- what you teach your children and how you treat others. 

People are teaching their children to hate and to have lives that are shortened because with living lies and deceit- there comes sickness and disease. Their lives cut short. Your life cut short. 

This is murder in the mind, affecting the emotions and causing physical death.

Friday, September 18, 2020

1,216 days May 21, 2017 - September 18, 2020 Alienated and estranged from her mom

  Abigaile sounds lethargic and drugged every time now on our supervised phone call. There is no response or engagement in our call. I can hear in her voice she is giving up. She no longer has life in her mind or her soul.  

What kind of person kills a child’s soul ?

May it be Your will,  God, that enmity will end and this new year will bring peace for us and the entire world.
May it be your will, God, that this year be full of joyful dates and meaningful relationships.

Love, hugs, sugars and more love,
Mommy
Xoxo
❤️💕

Monday, September 7, 2020

1204 days since May 21, 2017 on the eve of Abigaile’s 17th birthday

Written : 09/06/2020 -  I wanted to post this tonight to let Abigaile know that her mom is thinking about her and her mommy loves her her mommy misses her very much she is my life.  




   On this day 17 years ago we lived on a street named West End Street in Springdale Arkansas. I was very much pregnant at nine months and have been the healthiest pregnancy I had. We had no idea if  this baby would be a girl or a boy and it didn’t really matter because we knew that the baby was a child of God we knew that the baby was loved and wanted  and the gender didn’t matter to us because the baby is a gift from God always. 

   So on this day we were in an old farmhouse that we had bought to remodel and call home. We had completed really almost all the repairs we started out that we were going to remodel which ended up being renovated. Being mommy I wanted to make sure that the house was warm and clean and ready for my new baby. 

   It was an old farmhouse but it was beautiful had a gorgeous lot big mature trees and nestled in between a subdivision and some older mature homes. It had a fairly long driveway with flowerbeds all around and we had put in a Goldfish pond just in front of the living room window and the porch. There was a huge flower bed of Yellow and Orange irises.  Our daughter Natascha‘s pet bunny named Clover would be laid to rest and we would make him a stone with the name Clover on it and bury him. 

   But on this night everything had to be perfect because according to the schedule they were talking about an emergency C-section to bring this baby home. It was scheduled with intention of thinking that we could finish the house so we loaded up our little camper trailer we had outside sitting in the big driveway.  I had just purchased a few gallons well maybe 5 gallons or more of the most beautiful Linen colored paint to finish painting the floors upstairs. The only room left to paint was the playroom and then everything would be complete for our new baby and for our new family and our new home. 

   I finished painting, yes I had on a ventilator mask.  I love to paint a paint anything I painted peoples houses their bathrooms whatever for free just because it’s therapy for me. I love to paint.  I love art also and that kind of painting as well but I love painting houses and painting rooms it makes me happy. So I was painting and painting and painting and we had actually planned to sleep in our little camper trailer in the driveway because of the paint fumes and we thought it would be kind of fun to sleep in there for a few days while we let all the paint fumes out of the house and so that it didn’t hurt me or the baby or our daughter Natascha. 

   So I started painting and I painted one coat and everybody else was already outside in the camper trailer and we had everything in there for the next few nights and then I painted the second layer and got the second layer on I stopped I cleaned all my tools I got ready for bed and I went to bed. 

   My Abigaile tummy was not as big as I was with our first daughter but I was feeling pretty uncomfortable being nine months pregnant. I started to doze off and I kept looking at the ultrasound picture that I had sitting beside the bed and just staring at the beautiful little being on the picture. I could see her little head her arms her hands her legs even her feet even though we couldn’t tell what gender and it really didn’t matter what gender to us at all. We just wanted a healthy baby because our babies are a gift from God. 

   I started dozing off and I think I must’ve taken a short nap it couldn’t have been long and I woke up and I was very uncomfortable I couldn’t sleep my back was hurting. I got so excited about having a new baby that I couldn’t sleep. The more that I tried to sleep the worse that it got and the more than my back started bothering me.  I woke up the girls dad and I said - you know I’m pretty sure that we need to call our friends and have them to come and pick up Natascha.   Natascha can spend the rest of the night with them and you and I are going to the hospital to have our baby. 

   We had two names picked out,  Abigaile for a girl and I honestly have forgotten the name for the boy.  We got to the hospital after we met with our friends who picked up Natascha.  We told Deanna and Matt that we would call them tomorrow or it would’ve been today this was about 3 AM and we asked them if we could drop Natascha off at their home and we did. Natascha spent the remainder of the night ( well morning ) at their house.  When we got to the hospital I found out that my doctor was not on call.  He was out of town and so the on-call doctor came in and asked me how I was doing.  I said I’m going to have a baby today and he said that your scheduled in a few days.   I said no -  I’m going to have the baby today.

  So Abigaile was breach and bottom first and off to the emergency c-section.  Next I felt the scalpel - so it was too late to increase the meds so they delivered Abigaile I said hello and met our new daughter told her I loved her.  The next thing I'm hearing is the Anesthesiologist telling me he is going to knock me out.  I said okay.  This was about 11:00 am that morning.  I was being slapped in the face in recovery and had cold water washcloth, under a warming blanket.  I found out later that I had actually been close to over-dosed.  I learned they gave me narcan in recovery. It was dark when they took me back to my room.  I finally got to meet out little girl but not until after they had told us Abigaile had been given vaccines and eye drops.  They also told us that she was very sick and spiked a fever.  We later learned she was Group B Strep positive - and that they should have never given her the vaccines.  We spent several days additional in the hospital due to this.  

  We went home but not until we were scheduled with Bili light and lab draws daily almost two weeks.  

  Then the nightmare continued that I was fighting for this little girls life since day one - and until she was finally starting to improve after therapies and treatments in California.  The vaccine battle took me over Seven years- getting Abigaile stable and finally weaning her from meds and getting her to show progress with diet, therapy etc was almost ten years. 

   I'm guessing that having Abigaile well, happy and healthy was not good enough for people who were not in her life.  So on May 21,2017 her dad decided to abduct and Interstate her and her sister.  

  It was alleged that I was abusive and neglectful.   I'm guessing if you feel that being a full time stay at home mom who is the primary attachment and caregiver, home learning with and without curriculum based on the Childs progress.  I also managed their healthcare, trained in Abigailes therapies so if she ran low with funds from the vaccine entitlement that I researched, filed Vaers for, and have advocated for Abigaile her entire life - I don't consider this abuse or being neglectful.  It sounds like fraud and false accusations with no evidence to me.  Check Abigailes medical chart and her progress notes - tell me what that looks like.  I was also accused of not giving Abigaile her meds - even though I stayed at home and gave her meds.  

  If you referring how Abigailes life and her health was endangered in May 21,2017 - look at her medical record from that day on.  And refer to this https://www.psychologicalscience.org/publications/observer/obsonline/how-mother-child-separation-causes-neurobiological-vulnerability-into-adulthood.html#.

In addition to the numerous articles that speak to the trauma of a special needs child being forced from a primary attachment.  I was our daughters primary attachment, her primary caregiver.  I realize that culture hates this but this is what the girls dad and I chose for our children prior to marriage and in having children.  https://guilfordjournals.com/doi/pdfplus/10.1521/pdps.2017.45.4.542.

Our daughter having special needs and having made substantial progress with me with therapy and growth and development.  She was then forced into trauma in May 21,2017 and has been estranged from me for no justifiable reason.  

  Being a stay at home mom and caring our children while educating them at home doesn't constitute abuse or neglect.  And to say that I didn't give our daughter medicine is a bold faced lie- I was the full time attachment who was with her through everything.  This doesn't constitute or equivocate to abuse or neglect.  This has caused tremendous trauma to this little girl and has caused trauma abuse to me and her sister.  

Additional research:  Childhood attachment trauma, Child / Mother Psychological Trauma abuse, Parental alienation. 

Happy Birthday my beautiful Abigaile 


  Your birthday commemorates the day that God created you and said to you as an individual, are unique and irreplaceable. There is no other  person alive, no person who has ever lived, and no person who shall ever live, that can fulfill the specific role in My creation I have entrusted to you..."


  This is the day when you were given the mandate for your mission to help change the world. The day when God entrusted you with the mission to challenge a world that is so hostile spirituality and to be able to transform it into God's private garden sanctuary. And in accomplishing this goal you were given the ability to achieve incredible spiritual heights. The kind of heights that are unimaginable to the soul before it was dispatched from its lofty heavenly home to inhabit your physical body.


  Celebrating a birthday is also a demonstration of confidence. The type of confidence that you are and you will continue to be worthy of God's trust. No matter the obstacles, no matter the circumstances, you will persevere and live up to God's expectations of you.


  Fulfilling the commandments of God is the vehicle through which we connect to God.  It is how we are made in His image. 


  That means greater responsibility, but an infinitely greater connection, too. Your birthday is also the anniversary of this awesome occasion. This is reason to be thankful for your birthday. 


  When you were born it was God that  invested within you a soul abounding with talents and qualities.  These talents and qualities of your inner soul are those things God given to you that will help you to complete the mission that God has assigned to you on this earth. 


  On this day you have the ability to accomplish that which might be very difficult on any other day.  I pray that this day you feel a special connection to God.  That you are reminded of how God created you for your mission . Be blessed in Your special day the day that you and your mission was born into existence.  


Love your mommy,
xoxo

Tuesday, September 1, 2020

My #beloud story for my children - 1199 days of alienation and estrangement

Our beautiful girls Natascha and Abigaile just a month or so prior to abduction and estrangement. 2017.


Our story

My #beloud story 09/01/2020

     My 22 year marriage domestic terror nightmare since 2012- erupted on May 21,2017.  My story is a bit different in that there was no mention of separation or divorce prior to our children being abducted and kidnapped by their biological dad.  We had all lived together until May 21, 2017.  My husband and I since 1996. When our daughters were born in 1998 and 2003 we lived together until May 21,2017 when he abducted and kidnapped our daughters.  
     The past history is that there are addictive behaviors ( I have specific examples ) that were discussed between my husband and I numerous times prior to and during marriage.  There was also extensive inlaw conflict.  My husband and I agreed that we would never expose our children to the addictive behaviors and would remain a home with Godly morals and values.   
    I stayed at home with our children and was their primary attachment and primary caregiver and health care manager.  In early 2017 I asked my husband to seek counseling for these addictive behaviors.  This involved our daughters and I felt it directly involved their safety.  On May 21,2017 he abducted and kidnapped our daughters.

    I contacted the Arlington Texas police dept. who said I needed to let him cool off. If he came back they advised me not to bother him or get him upset. 
    In the days that followed I called numerous times begging the police to file a police report - they refused.  Stating he is biological he can do what he wants.  I called several missing persons agencies ( I have case #s and social workers id #s ) filing cases - they all refused to place an amber alert - refused to do anything because the Arlington police dept. refused to file a police report.  
   I contacted lawyers , domestic violence agencies - he is the biological dad they saw no divorce filing.  
  I had been a stay at home mom for 17 years.  I received no salary, money or compensation for that.  I cared for 14 years for our daughter who I had proven evidence and filed a vaccine injury for that I won in Vaccine injury courts getting entitlement for her for her injuries.  Also establishing Guardianship.  I was left with no money, no transportation , bank account was closed without my knowledge.  Money was being transferred without my permission or knowledge from our daughters Trust checking account to a hidden account # - I could see the transfer in online banking.  Eventually I was evicted from where we had been living.  We were Texas residents. 

  I contacted over 70 agencies including lawyers, attorneys ( no pro bono in Texas for civil courts).  It is all referred back to Legal aid.  Can you guess who used Legal Aid ?  I could not get Legal aid because it was a conflict of interest.  Legal Aid couldn’t tell me why. But I did have a very nice Domestic violence lawyer explain how that happens.  It seems that my husband of over 22 years used legal aid and filed for separation behind my back.  In addition he used the legal aid services.  He had a job with a salary.  I found they used legal aid when he filed for Separation, at Safe haven in Texas. After a 30 day free stay at the Safe Haven child trafficking agency  Dallas, Texas he apparently used funding from Texas and relocated to his moms house in Florida.  This is where he had me served December 2018 almost a year and half later while keeping the whereabouts, not disclosing to me where our children were, and not allowing our daughters to call, text or see me. 
   I had no job, no transportation and no money so I could not afford an attorney or lawyer and could not get legal aid.  My husband had stated that I was crazy and suicidal to the Arlington Police Dept. ( I had no idea what was even going on). I didn’t even realize he was abducting or kidnapping our children.  
  Once the divorce was filed I was told that I would have to hire a lawyer in Florida.  Even though I could prove that he lied, abducted and kidnapped our children.  Legal aid of Texas paid for it through safe haven trafficking agency by rubber stamp of the prosecuting attorney of Tarrant county Texas.  I have multiple agencies, case numbers, reports filed, emails, of agencies such as DHHS and DHHS oversight, State attorney Gen. State auditor, Governor, Domestic organizations who refused to help me other than giving me the local agencies who refused to help me ( because of the domestic lying terrorist who stole our children with no evidence, and nothing justified).  I have been treated like a criminal with no fair trial. This was Texas .  I was given no Due Process in Texas.  I was abandoned, deserted and left with no resources in a city with no family or friends. I was forced to have due process and custody for our children in Florida where we had never lived. I was literally left without any resources or legal aid while the person that perpetrated this received all the funding, got resources, had to prove nothing.  I have been in domestic violence in previous relationship and denied resources then also. 

  In December 2018 the day before Christmas I was served with divorce. Our daughters lives stolen, their innocence stolen, lied to , living in deceit like criminals running.  Our daughters whereabouts were kept from me, all information was hidden from me. The addictive lifestyle of lies and deceit being done while no one answered my texts, phone calls on where our children were - voice mails were full so I couldn’t leave messages.  Emails and texts were not returned.  I received a few photos but the absolute horrifying look of terror and fear on our daughters faces left me speechless.
   Even worse a system who along side a perpetrator of domestic terrorism.  All education, daily care, health everything was kept from me and once I found it was polar opposite more like the biological dad family of origin of whom we agreed our children would not be reared like.  Instead it was being done now the legal system was being used to perpetrate it.  

  Since the divorce filing Dec. 2018 I still didn’t have finances or resources to be able to hire a lawyer.   I was  told that I would need to hire a lawyer in Florida, a state that we never lived in. I was told to file for legal aid, but could not get legal aid because I didn’t live in Florida and never had lived in Florida.  I contacted Domestic violence organizations - I also have a list of org. And agencies in addition to the state attorney general, the governor etc for Florida.  The domestic violence organizations refused to help me because I did not live in Florida.  I contacted nationwide organizations who stated that I would need to live in Florida for 6 months to be a resident to use their services.  Really, if I had the money to move I would have the $5000- $15,000 that I was told would definitely get my children back.  I have lists , contact names and case #s.  Even in Florida.  I called the Bar as well and was given several names of lawyers and attorneys for Pro-bono work.  However when I contacted these lawyers there were no true Pro-bono but instead only a reduced fee or payment arrangements.  Up until December 2019 I was coerced into being Pro- Se I was not given an option.  I was told that I would lose my children and there was nothing I could do about it. That my case for custody that it would be filed as a default judgement. In other words that they punish you for the bad behavior of the other parent. Especially this prejudice is done harshly even more if you are a stay at home mother.

   I researched, spoke to other parents and finally figured out how to do my own motions, file them and how to do proper procedural rules with the court.  Rather than do nothing. I spent months working on this. We had court ordered mediation which resulted in me saying that I would never make an agreement with anyone , including the biological dad who has addict behaviors.  So then there was a non jury trial - I sent in a motion to file for telephone hearing, my answer and counterclaim- all on time, all on the docket.  The court hearing was rescheduled. Then the judge changed and then there was another court date from the first court date that was rescheduled.  
I had requested a telephone hearing I had this notarized, and served, I then noticed the opposing counsel had changed - I contacted the judicial assistant the week before the hearing to see if it had been approved. I was financially unable to go to Florida. I was told you have to attend the first hearing in person by JA.  I asked where that was in procedural rules and there was no response. I contacted the JA up until the day of the trial when new opposing counsel emailed me that morning of the trial and said that they had no problem me attending via phone to call the JA 15 min prior to hearing for the call in number which I did.  The JA did not answer the first two calls. It was 5 minutes prior to the trial that the JA answered I told her who I was and calling for the call in number. She told me that at that moment the Judge had denied my telephone hearing. The day of the trial.  I learned sometime after this that the judge had given sole custody to my now former husband and all decision making for our handicapped daughter. I also learned that fraud by the biological dad had been used in the court with no evidence to back this decision up.  

  In December 2019 I was in a group for parental alienation and met  a lawyer who is currently my lawyer.  I explained to her the timeline and what happened.  She took my case.  I finally felt relief someone especially anyone legal was on my side. My nightmare has still not needed.  I have watched our daughters health deteriorate. The team I worked with for almost 14 years including Guardianship and Health and medical trusts, her medical and alternative Dr. Because of the deceit and kidnapping have also protected the biological kidnapper.  Whilst allowing our daughters health her mental, emotional, psychological and physical health to deteriorate.  The Dr. Has refused me medical records and now refused progress notes.  Medical maltreatment and malpractice, in addition to Guardianship fraud and misuse of funds from her entitlement trust funds to be used for her health expenses.

  There was a hearing June 30,2020 for a motion to set aside the judgement regarding the fraud that had been entered into court previous, while my pro se response seemed to be invalidated and no response.  We attended via Zoom June 30,2020 for this hearing to which my lawyer provided the legal case and the judge ordered a decision to over turn the previous judgement from October 2019.  On this Zoom hearing, the judge scheduled a pretrial hearing ( when I called in for the the JA never answered and I left voice mails (2) that the JA never returned. ). I verified this number via text with my lawyer prior to the pretrial hearing. I was told by my lawyer - it wasn’t really a big deal it was all lawyer stuff about our case.  I thought it was a pretty big deal considering this is me and my childrens lives and so far I have no trust for the legal system or the system at all.  

  During the June 30, 2020 hearing the judge also set the Trial date for August 31,2020 an all day trial.  I was called last week ( Aug. 24th week ) to say there was a scheduling conflict - and they were hopeful that the other opposing counsel would work with them to reschedule. I was called at the end of last week to state the Judge cancelled the August 31,2020 date and the  trial would be rescheduled.  One daughter has aged out now- refuses to talk with me, refuses to text or email me - after being a stay at home mom to her for 17 years.  Parental abuse of parent alienation and enmeshment of the pathogenic parent.  

  Our daughter who will be 17 on next Monday sept 7th - they have been kept , withheld from me no holidays or birthdays - held hostage and this will be 4 birthdays.  This daughter has been mentally, emotionally, psychologically and medically abused.  There are medical records and progress notes to compare to evidence this.  

  In addition I am a co-permanent Guardian on our daughters entitlement that I won for her entitlement from the vaccine injury.  No one else took part in this.  NO one.  The biological dad is requesting to remove me as a permanent guardian in Arkansas.  The court to remove me as permanent guardian is September.  I do not have financial means for an attorney for this.  I have done multiple fundraiser over the past three years to which I have gotten $125.00.  I have spent more than that in mailing documents trying to be a Pro se that I never asked for.  

  I wasn’t able to afford to buy custody of my children where they could live as they had previous in peace.  I could go into details of behaviors etc in the past but I don’t feel it is relevant here. 

  I believe and feel I have been treated as a criminal with no trial.  I was literally Gaslighted by almost every professional agency, organization incising the Dept. of Justice and the FBI.  I was threatened by the DHHS intake for Tarrant Cty . Region 6.  I was asked by lawyers in Texas, once I knew my children were in Florida if I knew where they were and once I said Florida - I had lawyers to tell me that even if I had the funds that they would not represent me if they were in another state and especially Florida. 

  My children were trafficked by a biological parent to fit their own needs. Not for the best interest  or the safety of our children.  In addition with my experience the legal system and all local, state and regional government that is in place to be able to protect children - they do not.  Instead they exploit it and they further divide families so that they can further exploit  the family rather and make profit from it. Keeping moms and dads engaged to hate,  treating children like timeshares and chattle, casting the children for lots and exploiting them due to their own childhood traumas and addictive behaviors.  Our daughters funds are being exploited and our daughter is being used while her health and mind deteriorate.  

  I was told if I felt my children were in danger, which I do, that I could contact DHS in Florida.  That gives me no feeling of peace at all. You see the judge in the order in October 2019 declared our handicapped daughter a ward of the state of Florida.  Why? If our daughter were to be placed in to foster care or therapeutic care she would die.  Drugging her to stop seizures wouldn’t even touch the mental and psychological hell she has been forced to endure.  
  
  Thank you for a platform to tell my story.  I will continue to tell my story.  And I will continue to help other moms and dads with their stories and to help them navigate the system that destroys families and children while they profit.  

  Who will help us to save our children?  Those who have been given the platform are killing and destroying families for generations.  Causing mental, emotional and physical trauma abuse.  Who will help save our children?  If you are not taking part in helping to save them, then you are the part who is killing them.  

 #JusticeforAbigaile on facebook 
#Saveourchildren
#beloud 


Sunday, August 30, 2020

1,197 days May 21, 2017 - August 30, 2020 Abigailes mom is telling her story


2013 - Polfit wellness therapy Irvine, Ca.  Abigaile has been walking with single pole canes and a walker. Also taking independent steps up to 25 steps with only the therapy belt.  She can walk in the pool shallow end with no assistance walking between her dad and I - walking between her sister and I.

  

    Sadly, I have never experienced such abuse and trauma from such a dysfunctional system.  It thrives and promotes,  lives from dysfunction.  It profits from dysfunction - has anyone figured this out yet?  

   I have several more SUPERVISED phone visits typed out since the last one in July.  I also have the audio of Abigaile who can only say bye on every single phone call that she and I have together.  It really is horrific to hear your own child experiencing trauma abuse in addition to watching her be exploited by people who should want to see her make progress but instead the focus is on making her sicker, keeping her handicapped and continued drugging.  None of which she will ever make progress.  I was her primary caregiver and managed her health care for Fourteen years and she was rehabilitating, now she is bottom line - regressed.  I'm really talking to walls it seems because no one wants to listen.  And the BS of Childs best interest well I have yet to see that.  All I see is abuse and exploitation of my child since the day she was abducted.  
  
  Since May 21, 2017 I have been reaching out to agencies, government agencies, local, regional and state as well as Federal.  I have lists of all these agencies, multiple case numbers.  I have had validation from many different agencies and professionals clearly of what has happened.  In addition to I have worked in the system, volunteered in the system and I know what has happened.  Empirical evidence.  Why would anyone, who says that they wish to help a child and change a system not want Empirical evidence ?  Yeh that is a good question to ask? 

  Finally, I thought December 24,2019 I have someone to finally help get justice for me and my children.  I was so hopeful.  Motions were filed. A hearing date was set, then the previous year of Oct 2019 judgement was over-turned.  I felt I could finally breathe. I finally could help to stop the exploitation and Psychological trauma abuse, stop the medical maltreatment abuse, financial abuse.  During the hearing June 30, 2020 the judge set the pretrial hearing ( when I called in for this hearing the Judicial assistant never answered,  I left messages but I received no return phone call).  Decisions were being made regarding me and my child with out my presence.   During the June 30, 2020 hearing the date for the trial was set also.  The trail that I would finally be able to be hear, that I would get to take part in instead of me being set aside in October 2019 - or even me being set aside since May 21, 2017 and not allowed to be part of my Childs life while she and her sister abducted and interstate kidnapped by the biological dad they loved and trusted.  The Trial was scheduled for August 31, 2020 9 am- 5 pm.  

  I have watched my lawyers calendar.  I have counted the days down since June 30, 2020 believing that tomorrow would come and I would finally see justice for me and our daughter.  I have counted, looked at and marked off every single day for me and for my daughter.  In addition trusting that when I saw a hearing booked and not understand why, I still trusted.  
  
  This past week - days on calendar for pretrial prep being rescheduled and then I got the call and email that the trial had been rescheduled.  It knocked the wind from me, a literally slap in the face, a punch in the gut.  More trauma on top of what I am already carrying for me and my children.  And spoken of as though its no big deal.  Its just a trial - right?  So the abuse can carry on- the psychological trauma, the financial abuse, our daughters funds getting lower and lower, being exploited while people with their pride continue with their narrative of lies and deceit.  While everyone else collects a paycheck.  All at the expense of my daughters health.  It is all very disgusting, very reprobate.  The mental, emotional , medical maltreatment and munchausen syndrome.  All a disgusting plan of evil.  While our child deteriorates. 

  So tomorrow, August 31, 2020 9-5 would have been the day for justice but that isn't happening now.  More time to continue with the Psychological abuse while the narrative of those exploiting continue.  There was no reschedule date or time.  
  September the 7th is Abigaile 17th birthday.  This will be the fourth birthday that has been stolen from me and from her.  Four years of birthdays from the only person who made any effort to have birthdays for our daughters.  When no one else was there.  Sure there were cards, a phone call but never presence of anyone else no family - no one.  So now another birthday missed and stolen like a thief using a child as a weapon for their hate. 

  So to all those who have been part of this and remain part of this - causing trauma, harm, and literal abuse to our daughter  you have caused her severe trauma and childhood abuse.  
  You have stolen my Childs time from me , her mom.  And no one cares.  As the exploitation and trauma abuse continue.  

  I did not leave or abandon my children.  They were abducted and interstate kidnapped based on lies and false allegations. With no evidence, no justification, they have been estranged from me.  They have been projected and lied to.  They have been used.  Our daughter exploited and trauma abused.  Medically maltreated.  

  In addition to the terrorists that coerce a mom or a dad to sit by and watch their children be abused and exploited and to not be able to do anything about it.  We live in a sick and disgusting culture with reprobate minds.  

  Abigaile and Natascha mommy is so sorry.  I have made some really bad decisions in my life.  Sadly the system and many in it supports dysfunction.  Its profitable.  I will show you proof of all the dysfunctional agencies, police, governors, DHHS, domestic agencies.  It is beyond disgusting and deplorable.

  Abigaile another birthday stolen sweetheart I am so sorry.  Mommy will mail you package.  One day you will know the truth.
  Natascha your birthday stolen also.  You already know the truth.  Mommy is sorry for all you have had to experience and I know your heart.  

  I know that you both are smart, beautiful and intelligent.  I'm sure you had this all figured out , what happened, how it happened and the root of it all.  I can only pray that God keeps you both alive.  I can only pray that you both and I can keep Hope alive.  Because Trust in anyone or the system - died when you were both abducted and kidnapped.  

   I also know the will of God - I can only pray that the people of God , those who are not liars or thieves, who don't exploit children.  I pray that God sends people with moral values and ethics into this situation for Justice.  I want Justice for my children and I want Justice for me.  Right now I am not seeing it. 

love, hugs, sugars, and more love, 
your mommy <3 
xoxo
  

   

  

  

Friday, July 31, 2020

1167 days May 21,2017 - July 31, 2020 Abigaile tells her story


May 2017 Abduction and Interstate kidnapping - photo sent to me as though this was suppose to be comforting . 


ABGO call 7/31/2020 

Words: hi, screaming bye over and over, poppy, please, 

Storytime:  
  1. A little sweet tea - Abigaile has screwed hi and bye through all the book. In my mind and hearing my daughter she is angry - she is hurt and she is saying she wants to go bye to see me.  How many people have deprived her of her mom?  How many people have psychologically abused my child? Where is your evidence from keeping my child from me and where is your evidence of keeping me from my child? Enough of your false narrative. How barbaric and criminal.  Coercion , control and manipulation for selfishness. 
  2. Brown Bear Brown Bear- Abigaile is screaming during this entire story also. This is Psychological trauma speaking - DO you hear it ? No engagement- no response only screaming and saying bye over and over. 
  3. Old Macdonald had a farm - Abigaile is playing with a toy. A toy that makes noise.  I can hear noise in the background. I asked Abigaile can you say ma ma ma ? No response . No engagement. For the Baa I asked her if she could say Buh buh buh ? Abigaile keeps saying bye over and over and is crying. Now saying poppy crying - saying bye over and over. Can Abigaile say Duh duh duh like duck. She screamed bye over and over. I read about the pigs- asking her if she could say puh puh puh. She screamed bye over and over. There was NO engagement, no response - I can hear the pain in my Childs voice. This is beyond pain and trauma - how can anyone in or out of the system do this to a child much less a handicapped child who was thriving?  Psychological trauma abuse. 
  4. Pat - a cake - she screams bye over and over- no other words. 
  5. Wheels on the Bus- Abigaile can you sound like a horn and go beep beep beep? She says bye - over and over. No engagement - no response. Can Abigaile swish like a wiper? She only says bye ( over and over ) no engagement no response. Can Abigaile bounce up and down like people on the bus? She screams bye over and over. Saying please poppy.  What do babies on the bus do Abigaile ? Do they go ma ma ma ? Can Abigale say ma ma ma ? She screams bye. ( she is told to talk nice to her mommy - but her screaming and screeching and screaming over and over is - from not feeling heard ) and Im clearly talking to her. Then Abigaile says bye please and says please over and over. Mommies on the bus. ( blowing sugars) can Abigaile blow sugars? No response. 
  6. Five Little Ducks - are you there Abigaile ( I hear noise but no response). I read the story and asked her if she could quack like a duck. Can Abigaile say duh duh duh.  She responds Bye. 
  7. Incy Wincy spider- this was always a participating rhyme for her. She had no engagement and no response.
  8. Twinkle Twinkle Little Star - no response except screaming bye over and over. When I say Abigaile there is no response. I say mommy loves you and misses you - she screamed Bye. 

I told her I would find a different book or read Fish is Fish or Madeline next time. I asked her if she could say my mommy love me ( which she used to be able to verbalize). I have not heard her verbalize the word mommy at all in any phone call. I ask her if she is okay. She says bye. Mommy loves you and misses you - can you say my mommy loves me? No response. I keep talking to her and asking her to say my mommy loves me- I ask if she is there? There is no response. Then she screams Bye. She continues screaming Bye. I continue telling her I love her I miss her. I ask if she can talk to mommy I ask her to use her words and tell mommy - she starts screaming. She says bye I tell her that is good saying bye. She says Poppy - what can you tell mommy Abigaile - she says please. Why are you saying please Abigaile? She screams bye again. She screams bye several times. She says poppy and bye then poppy I asked her to be sure to give hugs to her and Natascha from mommy - and she says poppy and the phone is disconnected. 

# Justice for Abigaile and Natascha. Facebook page @JusticeforAbigaileandNatascha

# Child - Parent alienation and estrangement 
# Child - Parent Psychological trauma abuse 
# Child - Mother separation causes Neurobiological Vulnerability into adulthood 
# Medical maltreatment 

Wisdom

Day# 2409 Christmas 2023

Christmas 2023 - 2409 days without you    Sunday is one of my scheduled , supervised call days.   I typically read storybooks to Abigaile as...