Our daughter at age 5 months was vaccine injured. At the time we thought it would be a quick fix to the Dr. and she would be well. It didn't work that way. Here we are 13 years later. It not only injured our daughter but it injured our family as well. We stood on the Word of God and put God at the head of our house. This is how we did battle with this trauma. This blog was started to give inspiration and to have HOPE and FAITH in God.
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Trauma in families
a deeply distressing or disturbing experience.
"a personal trauma like the death of a child"
Trauma has been mentioned from the murder of Abel to the crucifixion of Jesus on the cross.
When we were initially going through this trauma I remember early on a day our daughter was having so many seizures. She was seizing so uncontrollably that I didn't know if I had slept, ate, went to the bathroom. I couldn't tell you what I did.
What I remember is seeing my lifeless baby seizing again, grey and pasty looking all wrinkled up on the sheets. I remember weeping so hard. Just to write this breaks my heart. That trauma has never gone away. To see my child hurting, not knowing if she was hurting. Just to see her little body and not knowing if she would be okay. It really broke me. My husband at work. I prayed so much just for the hell of all this torment to be over. I wanted my normal family back again.
Ill never forget feeling beside the bed and just asking God to please stop this nightmare over and over. I don't even know what our three year old remembers of this.
My husband at work. I felt so alone. So hurt. I remember wondering. How did Abraham feel when he was asked to sacrifice Isaac? I couldn't bear the pain. Was this what God was asking of me? No.
In fact from the very beginning God has always put on my heart that Abigaile is healed. So I felt in the back of my mind Abigaile is healed. Allen and I talked that God will use all these modalities to help heal her flesh. We tried medications to which she had major reactions. We felt helpless in this until we learned she was having allergic reactions to things in the medications . Then when it was time to start her on foods. She also had reactions to foods or some of the ingredients.
We were walking in faith. God was always first. We prayed as individuals, as family and as needed.
Abigaile didn't appear fixed yet. But Abigaile was doing well.
God was working through us. We were happy when we weren't facing the trials in this trauma.
And then when the trial was over we re-grouped with God and we kept walking, kept praying and kept believing.
God Works through those of us who experience Trauma. Many times Allen and I have been able to talk with moms and dads and share our story. We both have a huge amount of issues that we have helped with. Allen was always telling people to contact me or call me. But really he has a very unique set of knowledge in his own area.
He may not have always been in the medical support but I never doubted in that he couldn't care for Abigaile. He had his own set of worries. His position as provider was enough to be concerned.
We have either done it, experienced it, or been able to point someone where they can get help for it. Isn't this being the hands and feet of Jesus?
Isaiah 41:10New American Standard Bible (NASB)
‘Do notfear, for I am with you; Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.
I will strengthen you, surely I will help you,
Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’
Lord please strengthen us. Lord we ask that you remain the head of our families. That You raise up strong leaders of their homes. God please give the leaders and men of these homes strength in you. God may these families abide in you.
Abigaile was born September 2003. Abigailes mom had a perfect pregnancy no complications. Abigiale decided though when she was going to be born and seemed to be bottom first and breach. The Dr. decided that it would be best for mommy and baby to have a c-section.
The family was going through a house renovation at the time and mom was doing some last minute chores and at 3 am one Sunday morning mom was not going to go to sleep. Abigaile thought it was her time to make her entrance. So off to take big sister to a friends house and off to the hospital with mom and dad and soon to be Abigaile. We arrived at the hospital, got checked in as c-section wasn't schedule for a few more days. I walked and made no progress so Dr. said it was time for emergency c-section. A couple of hours later on Sunday morning we had our sweet girl Abigaile. The family who was watching Natascha brought new big sister to hospital.
It was one of the last visits that I had with the OB…
What you are going to see is a "change of heart". What you will also see on these pages are very real. This is a true story. It is about our little family from Northwest Arkansas who has been given a very big miracle from God.
You see our family was cruising along just over 13 years ago walking in the faith of God. Happy go lucky. Feeling highly blessed and favored. We had a beautiful little girl at the time was 3. We were ministering to a church (doing home church on the front porch and dedicated everything we owned to God).
That is when the bottom fell out of our floor. The things you see on these pages are very real. I have gone back and deleted some of the sentences because they hurt me so bad. I can't imagine what they did to our families who read them. Im so sorry I had no where to go with my grief. So I thought was grief. It was actually our faith being tested. I see this now with new eyes.
This blog and none of the others that I have were ever meant…
Im reminded of Fathers Day. This year just as hurtful as the year my dad passed away. This world is just not my home. I miss my daddy so much the pain hasn't completely gone away I don't think it ever will. My dad was such a good man. He was honest, full of love, had patience beyond understanding, had Joy talking to people, was kind and gentle to everyone he met. Im not sure he ever met a stranger. I seldom saw him lose self -control.
I would like to wish my husband Allen and dad of our two girls Happy Fathers day also.
I did want to wish all the Fathers out there Happy Fathers Day.
I do want to share this Fathers Day card with everyone though. Its really special because this Father is in Heaven and hopefully very soon we will see Him.