Wednesday, June 7, 2017

Trauma in families

    a deeply distressing or disturbing experience.
    "a personal trauma like the death of a child"
    physical injury.

Trauma has been mentioned from the murder of Abel to the crucifixion of Jesus on the cross.

When we were initially going through this trauma I remember early on a day our daughter was having so many seizures. She was seizing so uncontrollably that I didn't know if I had slept, ate, went to the bathroom. I couldn't tell you what I did. 

What I remember is seeing my lifeless baby seizing again, grey and pasty looking all wrinkled up on the sheets. I remember weeping so hard. Just to write this breaks my heart. That trauma has never gone away.  To see my child hurting, not knowing if she was hurting. Just to see her little body and not knowing if she would be okay.  It really broke me. My husband at work. I prayed so much just for the hell of all this torment to be over. I wanted my normal family back again.  

Ill never forget feeling beside the bed and just asking God to please stop this nightmare over and over. I don't even know what our three year old remembers of this.  

My husband at work. I felt so alone. So hurt. I remember wondering. How did Abraham feel when he was asked to sacrifice Isaac? I couldn't bear the pain. Was this what God was asking of me? No. 
In fact from the very beginning God has always put on my heart that Abigaile is healed. So I felt in the back of my mind Abigaile is healed. Allen and I talked that God will use all these modalities to help heal her flesh. We tried medications to which she had major reactions. We felt helpless in this until we learned she was having allergic reactions to things in the medications . Then when it was time to start her on foods. She also had reactions to foods or some of the ingredients. 

We were walking in faith. God was always first. We prayed as individuals, as family and as needed. 
Abigaile didn't appear fixed yet. But Abigaile was doing well. 

God was working through us. We were happy when we weren't facing the trials in this trauma. 
And then when the trial was over we re-grouped with God and we kept walking, kept praying and kept believing.  

God Works through those of us who experience Trauma. Many times Allen and I have been able to talk with moms and dads and share our story. We both have a huge amount of issues that we have helped with. Allen was always telling people to contact me or call me. But really he has a very unique set of knowledge in his own area. 

He may not have always been in the medical support but I never doubted in that he couldn't care for Abigaile.  He had his own set of worries.  His position as provider was enough to be concerned. 
We have either done it, experienced it, or been able to point someone where they can get help for it. Isn't this being the hands and feet of Jesus?  

Isaiah 41:10New American Standard Bible (NASB)

‘Do not fear, for I am with you;  Do not anxiously look about you, for I am your God.

I will strengthen you, surely I will help you,

Surely I will uphold you with My righteous right hand.’

My prayer:
Lord please strengthen us. Lord we ask that you remain the head of our families. That You raise up strong leaders of their homes. God please give the leaders and men of these homes strength in you. God may these families abide in you.  

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