When we are children we are taught to - think a certain way, then your senses and emotions cause you to feel a certain way , and then your body can react.
As we go through teens, young adult and adulthood - we add to that education. It is through experience or past experiences, and some people even allow others to make decisions for them. Allowing others when they don't have the same spiritual, belief system, or moral values can be a very dangerous experience. We are to each live and be responsible to our own actions. This is how we can best utilize those functions and gifts, unique talents etc that God has given to each of us.
When entering into a marriage this is why people who marry have the same spiritual, belief systems or same moral values. It is also expected that those spouses will grow in their spiritual and belief system, and hopefully their moral values will change to more reflect those of good and God. This is why your dad and I had many discussions and openly discussed our beliefs and experiences, as well as shared our moral values in the two years priors to getting married. In doing this we shared those beliefs and moral values in order to see where there might be compromise, or no compromise and the things we have experienced in the past that we were choosing not to live again.
When people live according to how others are trying to live and mimicking behaviors of others - that is not living the way that God created each of us. We can almost always find conflict and dysfunction in living this way.
The result of this is that some carry behaviors from their birth parents, even their siblings and if they are behaviors that aren't healthy they can destroy that persons life, their spouse and their children. So then this person may exhibit multiple personalities ( behaviors is really what personalities are in my experience ). You will find that this person really isn't their true self. And when they are with these other people, they take on the same behaviors in order to fit in to make the other people happy- that you act more like them. Another dangerous behavior.
God created us that we all eat, we all drink, we all get dressed etc. we are NOT all suppose to act, or do or especially behave in ways that are to make other people happy. Some days we are happy or sad - other people shouldn't have to be happy or sad to satisfy us or so we will still like them and be friends with them.
In todays culture it has been projected if one shows their emotions that they have mental disorder or are called unstable. When in fact, God created our emotions for us to experience them so we know when something is wrong. Especially if they are negative emotions. Drugs and therapy do not help negative behavior but instead coming to what is reality. Also in knowing what is real and what is fantasy - are reality and in good health.
We need to live for the mission that God sent us each here for. It doesn't look like anyone else' mission. It doesn't mimic anyone else mission. It is our mission. It is why we have peace when we sometimes go off to do our own thinking. It is so we can rid ourselves of the distractions and what others are telling us they would do.
Also to be said when there is a marriage involved - there are times in making decisions for the marriage itself, or for the children and that immediate family ( husband and wife ) have to be the only sources that make those decisions. The husband and wife can each gather information to help them make decisions about a particular situation. And the husband and wife only should then meet and have a discussion, with their research , only with one another about that particular situation.
It is never a good idea, nor is it healthy to speak to guy or girl friends or parents in regard to these things. In fact it can destroy a marriage and family like wild fire. You shouldn't go into a marriage expecting to marry or act like your in laws. And your spouse in turn should not expect you to act like your in laws.
I believe in my research and experience of being able to observe others that this is how multiple personalities start. My definition is not a clinical one but one of observation and personal experience. It is through out life that people sometimes take on others personalities ( behaviors) in order to please them or make them happy, so that we don't feel rejected, abandoned or left out. When this is done- the person bringing in others opinions, beliefs, fears or other behaviors - this is saying that the other spouse no longer has a say and doesn't matter in the marriage. Instead it is bringing outsiders into the marriage. You don't marry your in laws you marry your spouse. It is defiling the marriage that is between the husband, wife and God.
So while we are all single individuals - there can be many characters/ personalities playing out many given scenarios at one time. Causing confusion, dysfunction while playing out chaos and confusion inside your mind. One must detach from these multiple, confusing, conflicting and dysfunctional personalities in order to have peace of mind- peace of emotions and peace in their physical well- being.
While being intellectual you can sever yourself from emotions and succeed at intellect. While being in emotions will burn themselves up in a fire ball that will never end and will never produce anything that comes to action. Your physical body goes through mindless actions of the physical body movements from arms, legs, eyes blinking, and often meaningless actions every day- even most without a single thought.
It is when you eat your meals mindfully, your digestive health is healthy. When you do business with conscience and ethics it is fruitful and profitable, when you care for a spouse who is hurting, or caring for children who are hurting in trauma - then in all of these things is a harmony that is done and the personality is single and becomes one with the Creator who holds your soul.
My prayer for our girls today is that I pray that you recognize when working, being with others that you have your own unique mission from God. That mission is to not morph into something or someone else that others will try and project you to be. But rather that unique side of you that God has given you the gifts and talents in order to show others that YOU - are in fact unique.
If you have others who try and force you to believe, think or act as they do- step back from them and know that you don't have to do those things. Often it is their fear, their insecurities or dysfunction that they want others to feel the same as they do so they will feel comforted. I pray that you find more peace in your own unique individual self. There you will find God and He will continue to bless your talents and gifts that He has given to you to use on your mission on this earth.
This isn't to say that you can't have similar interest or likes as others - you can. But when you look at it this way keep in mind that each individual brings their own gift their own talent to the interest or like.
Momma loves and misses you both very much. When God brings us to things that are very difficult mentally, emotionally, and physically- it is best to make the decision that would be in the best interest of God and not culture. I continue to pray and hope that I will see you soon.
with love, hugs, sugars and more love,
love always,
your mommy , 📷 📷
xoxoxo
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