Playing Peek A Boo with God

Behind the veil is the Glory of God 

  Do you ever remember playing hide and seek when you were a child?  It probably started for you like it did with me that our parents started this little game of innocence when you were a baby.  It was most likely mom or dad who was playing peek - a -boo and then as you got older it became hide a seek.  These fun games also teach life lessons.  The game of peek a boo used to get shrills of laughter or cackling laughter, that sweet belly laugh of a baby or toddler.  It almost never failed.  If a child were to fall down and get hurt, immediately the peek a boo or hide and seek would come out.  Needless to say there were no game pieces to lose and no electronics involved. All that is necessary is momma and baby or momma and toddler.  However when the daddy jumps in and plays the baby is almost non-stop laughing.  

  God is much the same way as a parent.  Are there times that you are curious about where God is?  Like what is He doing?  Like you are in a situation and saying " God, Father its me- I'm right here. I know You love me and I know you care for me.  Can you see I'm suffering?  I give it all to You God will You please take it?  "   And then you meekly go on about you day, thinking God will surely show up in this situation.  There are minutes and days that go by, months and then years and all the while it doesn't seem like He heard me.  So I repeat again God it has been a couple of years now, remember that situation that I gave to you when it happened? And then I have prayed about it since?  

    All the while during this past two years I haven't sat still with this situation totally. I have been still. He tells us to be still.  That is so we can wipe out the distractions and being busy in life.  So we can hear Him. So we can hear His instruction in our mind.  And yet there are things along the way that He has you doing that are in correlation with this situation but you see no results.  Or so you think there are no results, because you can't always physically see the results being played behind the veil. 

  And then one day you start looking as though this situation is building a case.  A case in where God is going to definitely show up- like He has already been showing up but you can't physically see Him.  But He has been working.  Not only has He been working but He has also been building you.  Building you to where He wants you to be so that you can be better equipped for what He wants you to do in your mission on this earth. 

  So at times God seems hidden, but seriously where can God hide?  God is everywhere.  There is no place that is void of God. NONE. 

 So as a parent hides behind their fingers to play peek - a- boo with their child.  God also hides Himself with power and splendor while watching over His children to get the response that He desires so that we do good.  A Father who removes the veil and says, here I am child , come to me.  That is Gods way of expressing - Peek - A- boo !

  It is then that we hear His voice and sit in the comfort and the peace of His presence - knowing that He is ours and we are His.  Then we can laugh and say we knew you never left You have been here all along.  We just couldn't see You for You were holding the veil.  

  And that is what He was waiting for. 

  My prayer for our girls is that momma has played peek a boo and hide and seek with our girls many times. I believe even being the age you are today I would still play it with you. I have so many fond memories and fun memories of hearing you both laugh and cackle at the top of your lungs.  We haven't always been given the best of situations but we made the best out of them.  

  I pray that you know that God is always there- just as your mommy is always here.  I pray that when you feel frustrated, fed up, sad, and all the other emotions that can flood you and try to steal your Joy - know that God is right behind the veil.  You just have to pray when you make quiet, and He will remove the veil.   I pray that when things don't seem right, that you know things aren't right, that you can pray and that God will give you the answer.  I pray that God puts people in your life that will encourage you to do right instead of doing what is popular or what peer pressure says.  Peer pressure is guided by a group of peers who live in fear.  They believe that when they stand together in a group and all agree , not knowing all the information needed to make a good judgement- but instead they all agree.  Some one will always be hurt.  I pray you stand alone if that is what it takes, but do the right thing.  

  Momma loves you both very much and I miss you both very much.  I hope and pray to see you both soon.  

with love, hugs, sugars and more love

love momma, 

forever,

xoxoxo

Go back to the place before you were born

The Shekinah - the light of the Soul

The place from before you ever born - and in that place you will find the strength for every obstacle that you will ever meet. 

  We are a pure soul before we are born into this world and placed on this earth for our mission. The only desire at that time is to do good.  

  Once we are born we have been descended into a world controlled by a beast that screams from the outside.  Because of this beast that tries to get into your mind and control your thoughts - the confusion may get you to think differently than doing good.      Instead the beast wants you to live in fear and it wants to control and manipulate your mind with thoughts of " what if ?" .

  God created each son and daughter, we are all sons and daughters, religions will lie to you and tell you there are people who are not.  But that isn't true.  We are all created by God.  

  It is the voice of the mind control named beast that uses that " what if?" to get you to change your mind.  

  So even if one says that they swear they will always do good and always have good desires- you say you will always keep your word.  What happens when one doesn't?  How do you overcome your own desires when they aren't for the good?  How do you overcome your desires and wants when they harm other people and cause trauma to them? 

  It is because this oath that you swore to, reached into your soul and it reached a place that surpassed all of your desires and the place where the light is, the light of the Creator.  This place is where reasoning and desire are no more powerful than the light of the Creator.  It is in this place that your soul swore to do good, despite reasoning and desires.  

  When life and the demand to do good and to do the right thing before God seems to difficult to do.  Go back to that place into your soul , where the light is , and rekindle that light, rekindle that fire at the very core of your being.  

  This is the place where the world , the CULTure, and the beast bow down as a servant to its master.  

  This is the place that you existed before you were born.  Your soul. 

  The place that surpasses all understanding.  

  My prayer for our girls is that you both when in exile, when in turmoil, when in despair - all those things that you get caught up into of the world, the CULTure, the beast, and even other people.  Go to a quiet place.  Go to where nature is predominant.  And sit in the still with your eyes closed, and taking some deep breath.  Letting go of the world, CULTure and the beast.  Sit in the stillness and imagine in your mind going to that place in your soul- while your traveling to the soul in your mind , when you see the light - the light looks as a candle.  It has a bright beautiful flame with a pure light glow.  Thats where you stop, and you sit in the light and leave all your world, your CULTure, the beast at that place and give it to God.   He will take those things from you.  And when you leave don't forget to take with you, your light.  The light will bring you Joy and peace going back out into the world.  Go back out in to the world with the tools of Joy and peace- with intent to do the right thing, and to do good in the world.  It is how the world and CULTure get changed.  

  Momma loves you both and I miss you both very much.  The only thing that keeps this mommy motivated is my light- and to keep my mental picture of Abigaile and Natascha, our beautiful girls in my mind.  And to stay present in my soul, with my light.  My light, He is my Creator.  He is my love and my everything.  

with love, hugs, sugars, and more love, 

love your mommy, 

forever,

xoxoxo

God is everywhere

God created each and everything thing on this earth and each thing within its own realm.  The realm in which it exists is its own being - the world, culture, other people, places, animals or things - it does not exist.  It only truly exists with in its own unique body.  

  There are then thoughts or ideas that exist only in the world of the mental power to understand reasoning and understanding objectively.   

  In nature or in the mind of creatures - this type of intellect doesn't exist.  In this world of the creature, only emotions exist.  

 Emotions exist in a world where creatures exist on the capacity to feel, perceive, or to experience based on the senses, personal feelings, or opinions.  This is not thinking with ideas, thoughts or intellect.  

  In the physical world of things such as fire, earth, wind, or water, rocks things that are inanimate - emotions are non-existent there also. 

  In the world of languages - it is only words, sentences, communication between other human beings that exist.  

Animals do not have human languages that exist.  Animals do not have words, they do not have sentences.   

  Instead animals perceive emotions by the ability or capacity to feel, perceive and experience things based on their senses or past reflection of events that caused certain reactions.  

  God is not just a word in a language- God is not a feeling- God is not a emotion - God is not a idea or a symbol of anything else. 

What God is - Is reality.  

  God is the center of all things.  God is the center of everything.  God is an essential reality of all things in reality.  God is also the essential reality in each thing.   God is the essential energy ( life) with in all cells and all living things.  God is the nucleus of all living things.  

  

God is in reality - God is everywhere . 

  My prayer for our girls today is to know in your heart and minds that mommy loves you and misses you both very, very much.  

Also know that mommy would never abandon or leave you both, never.  

  I pray that when you see people, places, or things that you search for the very being of God and the character of God in each person.  You can see the physical beauty of God in the places that He created.   Know that every form of living creature has God with in it- and surrounding it.  

  I pray that God reveals Himself to you in all your thoughts, in your emotions - the way you feel, perceive or experience by your feelings, your senses and your past experiences.  God gives each of us the innate ability to do this.  Seek God in this and don't allow others to infringe upon this.  These are key qualities to survival.  The way that God created each of us to live, not by peer pressure, or others controlling and manipulating our thoughts, beliefs, or circumstances.  We have been given by God - emotions and senses to perceive danger and to know when situations are not safe.  We have been given intellect and taught what to do when we need to leave those situations.  

 When people try and control others thoughts or actions those are based on fear and anxiety - not reality.  

 Don't live in others past regrets.   But instead live the way God has shown to you - your reality.  Through your own thinking and your own mind. 

  I pray for your safety, your well being, that God will bless your thoughts with Joy and peace.  I pray that you know that anxiety and fear are not thoughts of God but instead thoughts to distract you from God.  Popularity and people pressuring others to do things against their will are also contrary to thinking the way of God.   I have taught you to think while growing up - to be positive to show love and kindness.  We don't have to allow others to control our thinking - nor do we have to control others thinking.  That is " stinking thinking". 

  I love our girls very much and I miss you both - I hope to see you both soon.  

with love, hugs, sugars, and more love, 

your momma, 

forever, 

xoxoxo

What is your birthday? - birthdays of our beautiful girls a time of reflection

2016 Birthday mission - Conway, Arkansas

A birthday is a mission that you are able to give to the world, your specific mission, something that no one else can do. 

  A child is a gift from God, placed in their mothers womb.  And in that womb you were comfortable, warm and you were cared for. 

  But after your allotted time in the womb - you had to leave that nice, warm comfy place to go out into the world.  The world of cruel, harsh, cold, and bitterness.  The cruel, cold world where many bitter people who are resentful place their bitterness on others. Where the simple act of living sometimes is just a struggle. 

  You cry when you sense the cold, or when you have a need. 

  But yet every year on this day is a celebration.  Why do we celebrate this day?  

  The day that you left the womb you no longer were the extension of another being but instead you became your own unique individual. 

  The day that you arrived in to the world as your own unique and talented individual - God empowered you with gifts and talents that no other individual could give.  Not even your parents could give you.  And no one else who could teach you skills or trades, no one can give or empower you will these talents or gifts that God has given to you.  No amount of money can buy these talents or gifts that God can give to you.  

  So when you celebrate your birthday, think of the real reason why you are celebrating- it is not for the gifts, or the cake or ice cream.  The real reason for your birthday is so that you can reflect on the gifts and talents to be used for your mission in this world. 

  Take time to reflect and think, what have you given to the world that the world did not give to you ?  

  That is the meaning of birthday.  

  My prayer for our beautiful girls. I pray that you both had wonderful birthdays.  That you can take time to reflect the real meaning of your birthdays.  What has God given to you that no one else has given you?  The gifts and talents - that God has put inside you to be able to show others that you undeniably have the gift of life - but you also have the gift of God to be able to reach others.  I pray that our girls know that I, their momma love them both and miss them both very much.  I pray that our girls know that I did not take you away from me, and I have not kept you away from me.  I will always be here for you both, with open arms, with love and knowing that you can come back to me.  I can not think of two more wonderful and beautiful gifts that God could ever give to me than our daughters Abigaile and Natascha.  I pray that God reveals to you on your birthdays more birthdays and He continues to give you gifts and talents to be used for His will and His ways. I pray to be able to see you both again soon. 

with love, hugs, sugars, and more love,

love mommy, 

forever <3 

xoxoxo

Priorities of the Soul

  In order to gain from the fruit of the Spirit we must make priorities to make our Spiritual lives first and then our physical lives. 

When placing our Spiritual needs we essentially are giving life and oxygen to our mind, our soul and our body. Giving our Spiritual life precedence or being first in line, we give life to ourselves.  

  It is like being on an airline and losing air pressure in the cabin.  You have your child on board with you.  Whom do you give the oxygen first ?  Our first inclination is to give it to our child because we want to give life to our child.  We want to always give to our child their needs first.  

  But in reality it is the adult and parent that needs the oxygen first so that they can follow instructions or do what they have learned in experience so they can help the child.  The child is not mature enough and hasn't lived life experience to fully understand what to do or how to do this emergency.  

  We often look at caring for the soul or treating the soul as secondary in life.  We place our physical needs first.  We treat eating, sleeping, making money giving priority to these things instead. While these things are important to physical well being, we are wearing down our souls. We treat eating, sleeping, and making money as a routine and too important, and too valuable to be interfered with including family.  An individual rights to work has been made more important than the needs of their soul, spouse or children.  Leaving their soul empty and therefore leaving their spouse and children feeling alone. 

  Spiritual health is then pushed aside and left for when you feel like it. Leaving prayer, meditation, and study for when you feel like it. Or you may attend a church and socializing is the topic of the sermon. These things leave your soul empty. 

  When you ask yourself what is this life all about?   You have to make spiritual priority to your inner soul.  We must treat our inner soul more important than anything else so that it becomes a priority.  When doing so we are able to make good decisions over bad. We have healthy emotions over bad emotions.  We have good physical health over bad health.  We must treat our inner spiritual soul as an athlete and exercise our soul as though we are preparing for the Spiritual olympics. 

  We need to treat our Spiritual soul as though it is our most valued resource , a valued business and without it we lose our life. 

Without the soul, we are spiritually dead. 

  The intrinsic nature of the soul has value and determines character when in unity, becomes one in unity, with its source -God.  The soul of every man, woman , and child is literally part of God above.  The soul has influence over the mind and emotions having influence on the physical body, sickness or being healthy.  When we place our soul health first , our Spiritual health will be healthy then the rest of our body will be in good health. 

  My prayer for our girls today is that you place your soul and Spiritual health above everything and everyone else.  It is the best way to have and prosper in good health.  Being in Unity with God above means placing your soul health first.  My prayer is that you have a desire to connect with your source , God.  I pray that your soul gives you new life, new emotions, thoughts and speech, new intelligence, insight, Godly will , a new identity, a new personality.  I pray that your Godly soul be blessed with the things and the spirit of God.  

  I pray that your soul being awakened will bring you most of all Joy and Peace .

I love our beautiful girls and I miss you both very much.  I pray and have continued hope and faith to see you both soon.  

with love, hugs, sugars, and more love,

love your mommy, 

forever <3

xoxoxo

Life is a battlefield

Life is the battlefield that has been set in time for the light to overcome the darkness of the world. 

The battle between light and dark will be like in the times of Ceasar when the Romans fought with gladiators. 

Name one darkness and name one light.  The sound of the crowds will gasp when darkness falls -  and when light overcomes the dark the crowd sounds like those who cheer their favorite sports team. 

Throughout the battle of the fight we tend to place each of us in the gladiators shoes feeling as though it is our own personal fight. 

While watching the tournament of light and dark on the battlefield we realize that it was darkness we were fighting but we always got up and started moving forward again.  We always were able to win over dark with the light. 

As we laugh out loud we know that God our Creator sits and watches us with His everlasting Joy as He watches our victory over and over again. 

Even as it happens now. 

Mommas prayer for our girls is that you know when you see something in this world or walk into a situation that you know is dark.  Know that God has given to you the means to overcome the dark with your light.  Don't think or believe for one minute that dark ever had the upper hand.  Don't ever be misled that dark will overcome you.  Because it wont. It cant.  You have God cheering you on in your own personal fight.  And know that your light my beautiful girls will always over come the dark. 

And even now God sits on His throne, in complete control and He has everlasting Joy for each of you because He knows that He is yours and you belong to Him - because that is how your daddy and I taught you and it will stay with you forever so you have everlasting Joy <3 I love you and miss you both very, very much xoxo

with love, hugs, sugars, and more love, 

love your mommy <3

xoxoxo

There is nothing more rewarding than finding your own reward at the end of darkness

It is finding the reward while fighting the darkness in your life and knowing that you have won.  

Finding reality of where God the Creator exists is not the prayers of the righteous - or the revelation of those who have insight. 

Finding reality of where God the Creator exists is not in the good deeds, or good intent of the righteous, nor is it in the love and kindness of those who live together in joy and harmony.

In these situations one would find the light, a light of hope, a light of love, joy and kindness and maybe even a peace.  

But to find the realness of God the Creator -  beyond the darkness and the light - where God is working with intent would be to find God in those who struggle. 

Those who struggle on a daily basis through the quicksand of life.  Those who struggle and say , " why me God"? 

Thats where the intent, the faith and the soul of God rests.  Reality of hardship.  

Those who are in bondage of culture - those who are in behaviors prison, they do everything to try and catch a glimmer of light at the end of their dark tunnels.  They try, they fail, and repeat over and over again.  

It is because of this struggle, that God, Himself can come down in His spirit and show Himself clearly in this struggle and show you light to once again be able to get out and escape that prison. 

Finally it is when the escape of the prison walls have been broken down - and the escape from every struggle has been made, I believe that God cries out His pleasure in Creation - saying that His moment there with you, was worth it in itself.  Not the struggle, but the escape from the struggle. 

God please show us and guide us to be renewed, and strengthened , as we share our struggles and our burdens with you.

I pray for our girls that no matter the struggle- your reward is God.  There are no situations, no circumstances, no bondage in any situation that you can not call on God.  Seek God and ask Him how to show you to pierce the walls of the prison of whatever feeling that your in that you feel is trapping you.  Keeping you hostage.  Thank God for releasing you, before you see it in the physical that He has released you from this prison you are held in.  And keep thanking God.  And when you least expect it- you will see the shimmer of light and that shimmer of light will lead you along the way to being Free <3. 

This momma loves and misses our girls so very much.  I pray for God to give you wisdom. I pray for God to keep you both safe from harm. I pray for those who you are in their care.  I remain with intent, hope, faith, and trust in God that you will return home soon to your momma.  I pray for God to place people who are Warriors in His Word and His ways , His armies to help guide you along the way.  

God send out Your life and Your Truth and guide us all along Your path <3

With love, hugs, sugars, and more love, 

your momma <3

xoxoxo

Happy Birthday to our beautiful daughter Abigaile

‎Paris Golec‎ to Whole Body Restoration Ministry

2 hrs

Happy Birthday our beautiful girl Abigaile, 

My dear sweet daughter Abigaile,

Your birthday commemorates the day that God created you and said to you as an individual, you are unique and you are irreplaceable. There is no other person alive, no person who has ever lived, and no person who shall ever live, that can fulfill the specific role in My creation that I have entrusted to you..."

This is the day when you were given the mandate for your mission to help change the world. The day when God entrusted you with the mission to challenge a world that is so hostile spirituality and to be able to transform it into God's private garden sanctuary. And in accomplishing this goal you were given the ability to achieve incredible spiritual heights. The kind of heights that are unimaginable to the soul before it was dispatched from its lofty heavenly home to inhabit your physical body.

Celebrating a birthday is also a demonstration of confidence. The type of confidence that you are and you will continue to be worthy of God's trust. No matter the obstacles, no matter the circumstances, you will persevere and live up to God's expectations of you.

Fulfilling the commandments of God is the vehicle through which we connect to God. It is how we are made in His image.

That means greater responsibility, but an infinitely greater connection, too. Your birthday is also the anniversary of this awesome occasion. This is reason to be thankful for your birthday.

When you were born it was God that invested within you a soul abounding with talents and qualities. These talents and qualities of your inner soul are those things God given to you that will help you to complete the mission that God has assigned to you on this earth.

On this day you have the ability to accomplish that which might be very difficult on any other day. I pray that this day you feel a special connection with God. That you are reminded of how God created you for your mission . Be blessed on your special day- the day that you and your mission were born into existence.

I'm thankful that God chose me as your mommy to be the vessel to give birth to you, and your mission. I will always love you and I will always be supportive of the mission that God has sent you here to this earth for.

with love, hugs, sugars and more love,

your mommy

xoxoxo

I have shared this with your daddy on email along with a mission gift to help with your mission xoxoxo <3

Abigailes birthday today

  Happy day of your birth my beautiful Abigaile. 

  An appointed time that God trusted your momma and daddy to love, care, and teach you in the ways of God and His kingdom.  God placed you Abigaile here so you can be able to do service for God, given to you on the day of your birth. You have so much to give and you have given so much at such a young age already , but you still have so much more that you will give. 

  I pray that you are empowered today to give the gifts that God has given to you.  When God gave your birth He has given you something very special. He gave you something that is exclusively for you and only originates in you that you are to share with the world.  The meaning of your life and the purpose of your birth and being brought into this world is to make it that way.  

  It isn't a talent or a trait but a vision and the success of this vision depends on your faith and your trust in God in it.  

  My prayer is for you to have faith in this vision that God has for you in this life so everyone else will have Fatih and will see the vision also.  The world may be hostile to your vision and faith but keep your eyes on God and the vision that God has for you.  

  I pray that God multiplies your faith as He will multiply your wisdom.  I pray that what is shattered will become whole again as God created it.  I pray that illnesses that will be found will all be healed.  

I pray where there are desperate voices I pray for harmony.  

I pray for faith that cannot be moved, faith that does not react, faith that only grows and clings to God and cannot or will not change and will not decay. 

The vision God has given to you makes you relevant and your faith is what makes you real. 

with love, prayers, and blessings

for our beautiful Abigaile 

to celebrate the day of your birth,

love mommy <3 

How to let it all go

Footprints

One night I dreamed a dream.
As I was walking along the beach with my Lord.
Across the dark sky flashed scenes from my life.
For each scene, I noticed two sets of footprints in the sand,
One belonging to me and one to my Lord.

After the last scene of my life flashed before me,
I looked back at the footprints in the sand.
I noticed that at many times along the path of my life,
especially at the very lowest and saddest times,
there was only one set of footprints.

This really troubled me, so I asked the Lord about it.
"Lord, you said once I decided to follow you,
You'd walk with me all the way.
But I noticed that during the saddest and most troublesome times of my life,
there was only one set of footprints.
I don't understand why, when I needed You the most, You would leave me."

He whispered, "My precious child, I love you and will never leave you
Never, ever, during your trials and testings.
When you saw only one set of footprints,
It was then that I carried you."

It is not my will Father but Your will,

Love,

Your daughter 

Happy Birthday my beautiful princess

I wanted to wish my little girl a Happy Birthday.  I know princess that no matter where you are that your mommy loves you and Jesus loves you.

I remember that day September 7, 2003 just as if it were yesterday.

I had just finished painting the floors at the house on West End st and went to bed around midnight.  I went to sleep with your ultrasound and a magazine on my chest.

The outline of your ultrasound is still etched forever in my mind.  I can still see your eyes. They say that your eyes are a window to your soul and all I saw was clear all the way down in your little soul and you weren't even born yet.

I was so excited to be able to meet my princess that I couldn't sleep. I actually think I caused my self from excitement to go into labor.  I woke at about 3 am and just couldn't go back to sleep.  I wanted to see my new little princess so bad.

I eventually woke your dad up and told him I needed to go to the hospital and then we woke your sissy up and told her that we needed to go to the hospital.  We took Natascha to a friends house so she could play and spend the night while you made your way into this world.

You are born around 11 am and from that hour on your little life has been hectic.  I am so thankful that God gave you to me. You have made my life so complete.  I have admired how people have been so mean, haven't been in your life and you still love and show love no matter what.
You have given your mommy Joy in such a unique way that I can't even explain it.

I couldn't wait to see you. I know how excited I was to see Natascha as a baby and you were no less exciting.  You both made a grand entrance.  An emergency c-section is not something to laugh at.  I thought you were the most beautiful baby ever.

Your dad , Natascha and I had so much fun playing pretty , pretty princes waiting for you to come from the nursery.  It was so fun. Even going through the hell at that time we were not shaken.  Your dad sitting with his tiara and ear rings, and adorned like a princess. I wished we would have had enough money to have phones with cameras then so we could have take pictures.

I was so afraid when they told me that you weren't well. The major antibiotics, the tests and knowing you were going home with a bill-light I knew the liver was being over taxed. I just wanted you to be healthy.

Children and our family were more important then that phones.  Ill never forget we went to Sam's club to take a family picture. It was the last one we had taken right after you were born.  Last family photo was Fourteen years ago.  I kept choking and trying to hold back the tears scared to think that it might be your last photo.


I love you my beautiful princess and even though I don't know where you are right now your mommy misses so much it hurts and I love you. Your mommy wasn't given an option to be with you on your special day.  I will always love you my little princess. I hope God blesses your day today.

I would die for you,
love your mommy