Don't fall in Love

Love is not an emotion - Love is an action word- a verb  

like the saying of your actions speak louder than your words.  Love is hard work, putting your spouse before yourself, putting your children before yourself.  

   Many can speak and try and articulate a warm, fuzzy feeling or even a lustful feeling ( like taught on the romance movies, which really isn't romance at all.  it doesn't exist except the movie.   But instead your actions of how you treat the person and how the other person will treat you is love.  

Your actions speak louder than your words. 

  To my girls, my daughters -  do not seek Love.  When you are trying to find the right young man - 1.  don't try to find a man because CULTure at a certain age in life believes you need to start searching for this young man.  Which is a lie.  Instead God will bring you together in His timing.  Don't look for him, don't search for him and most of all - completely ignore what friends, family, the media, health or any other professional tells you.  They can be detrimental to your relationships.  

  Love is all orchestrated by God.  When you allow others or seek others for advice on what God has ordained you will entitle your relationship, friendship or marriage to doom.  It is certain doom.  

  Our CULTure teaches that love is romance- another lie- that stands to profit from those warm fuzzy feelings ( either the emotions connecting - or lust that has been taught by CULTure ) but this is not Love. Not true Love.  CULTure believes that you will fall into these warm fuzzies and you will experience romance, something of which you will effortlessly fall into and it will happen suddenly and without any effort or work at all.  All fantasy, all LIES.  

  True Love is when God ordains the Love , placing the man and woman on one another path in life.  Not a dating app, not a chat room, not anyone double date, blind date or any of this nonsense.  But when God puts you in someone path you will know it.  But it isnt that warm fuzzy feeling instead they intrigue your thinking, not a perverse way but instead they genuinely love and care for you and want to care for you.  You won't always think alike but instead each of you will likely fill the gap where the other doesn't fit.  One will be strong in finances - the other not so much.  The other will be strong in other areas.  While you will have things in common don't follow CULTure, religion, or tradition is instead follow what God says.  

  You have a man and woman, who seem to cross one another path.  They marry and live together.  They deeply care for one another in being sick and health and through all of life storms.  They build a home together ( this doesn't mean you have to have a house but instead your surrounding is built with your immediate family in mind, caring , loving and nurturing your immediate family.  And you raise your immediately family, with your children together and you don't allow others to dictate or to cross boundaries that the two of you have set together.  But instead you protect your immediate family because you are no longer your childhood immediate family.  The man and woman live in this manner until one day - they discover that they can not live without one another.  

 If you can not separate the two and be your own immediate family, then you should not marry , and you should not have children.  You will not live in your married life like you lived your childhood because in your childhood that was your mom and dads insight from God and that should not be hindered by other, not even extended family. 

That is LOVE.  

  You can't fall in Love but instead you must create Love. 

 Love is being married, creating a home and a family together.  Sticking together no matter the storms and turmoil in life and raising your family together.  And protecting your family that you have married and God has blessed with children.  

  My prayer for our girls is that one day you will find a young man who you can create this Love with.  I pray that you will never experience the pain and trauma that I have experienced in this life, in your relationships. I pray that you are able to keep God as the head of your home whether you choose to stay single or to get married.  I pray that if and when you do marry that you allow God to be your Head of your marriage, head of your home and the head of your family.   In fact I hope and pray that you will never make the mistakes that I have made in this area.  

  with love, hugs, sugar and more love, 

your momma, 💓💜💓💜

XOXOX